Writing II
Nice holiday in East Kalimantan
The story happened six years ago, before my father passed away. I think it was unforgettable moment with my father. My father usually asked me to have holiday at the other city or went to the place where he worked. It was school holiday, and I have passed final examination. When my father still worked at Kumala island, East Kalimantan, suddenly my father called my mother and asked my brother and I to have holiday there. He wanted to spend his time with us together.
The next day, my mother and I bought the ticket at Juanda airport. Because that day school holiday, the price be so expensive. One of the ticket for Balikpapan about Rp 800.000,- by Lion air. I think it was so expensive for destination to Balikpapan. From Juanda airport, my mother and I bought some snacks and drinks for the next day.
I still remembered tha day, on Friday morning, at 6 p.m., my mother woke me and my brother to take a bath. My mother picked us to Juanda airport. Unfortunately, my mother couldn't go together with us because she was very busy. At 8a.m., I walked to the Lion air plane. I felt so nervous and happy too, because it was the first time I went there. From Java to Kalimantan about two hours. At 10 a.m., I arrived at Balikpapan airport. The airport so unique with the beautiful art design. It looks Kalimantan art culture. Exit from the airport, I saw my father waited us at the other side. We called him and he looked at us. Then, we continue to Tenggarong city, It is the city where my father worked. On the way to Tenggarong, I saw beautiful scenery . I passed the forest, I saw high trees, Long beautiful river, and etc. About 2 p.m. We arrived at Tenggarong city. Before enter the city, I passed beautiful bridge and there is Mahakam river of the bridge. The bridge looks like London bridge with the beautiful art design. There is a symbol of East Kalimantan too. About 10 minutes later, I arrived at house where my father stayed.
The next day, my father asked us to go to the place where he worked. It is Kumala island. I never knew it before. My father told us that Kumala Island located in the middle of Mahakam river and around the island just for entertainment place looks like Dufan. I have to passed the river by boat. Arrived at Kumala island, I saw nice words with the unique art design of kalimantan. There are 3 security on the gate. Then, my father asked us to enter the office. Because he wanted to introduce us to all of his friends and everyone who works there. About half an hour, my father asked us to play any kinds of game. Before play the game, he rent a free car for us with driver to saw scenery around Kumala island. On the way, i saw traditional house on the corner of Kumala islands and i looked symbol of Kumala island. The symbol is a big statue called Lembuswana. There was a history why Lembuswana be a symbol of Kumala island. There was a story from the driver of the car, that sometimes if night come, usually people or security passed Lembuswana or looked traditional house, they looked a ghosts or girl crying at the stairs of traditional house. About one hour we spent time to see around kumala, My brother and I played any kinds of games there. Thhere are many kinds of interesting game, like Boom boom car, trampolin, Sky tower, hanging train, and etc. At 2 p.m., we have lunch together. My father told more about Kumala. I felt interesting with his story. It was nice holiday and unforgettable moment with my father. I felt happy to saw Tenggarong city and could spend my time at Kumala island. Because i never realized that it was the last time i spent holiday with my father. I hope i can go there next time.

I think your paragraph is great..
BalasHapusbut you can edit
"I still remembered tha day,"
with "that day"
and u can edit
"i saw traditional house "
"Because i never realized that it was the last time i spent holiday with my father. I hope i can go there next time."
with capital word "I"
wildania!
BalasHapusyour paragraph is good,.
with capital word "i" ->but, "I".ok!
i think your paragraph is good enough,eventhough there are some mistakes.
BalasHapusand you describe your unforgettable moment with interest word.
heii ..
BalasHapusyour paragraph is good ..
congratulation ..
i am very interesting with your paragraph ..
that's all ..
give me comment too.
i think yur paragraph is good ..
BalasHapusyou describe with interesting ..
but i found some mistakes .
you can fix that ..
give me comment too ..
(Ranti P. Nastiti 120810190G)
i think your paragraphs are good....
BalasHapusu described it with easy understanding language..
But there are still some mistakes on ur pharagraphs..
But it's ok,,
u can do better on ur next project...
Hmm.. all of my friends, thanks for comment my blog.
BalasHapusHello
BalasHapusIm Sory me scarer coment in your BLog
because i am opportunity Confused make coment in blog.
i think Your Writing is very draw,,,,,, and tighten
...and please check your gramer...ukai,,,,,,,
Thanks...RUDINAL 120810491G
your writing is order,..
BalasHapusand in your paragraph is good enough,.
I like it,..
elok 120810486G
Hi.....diTa,,,
BalasHapusi think your paragraph is good enough and focus....
but,,i found some mistakes in your writing,,it's okay,,,
so far,, you tried to write a good paragraph,,,dont forget for giving me a comment,,okaY??!!
thank's,,
:)
Hy dita....
BalasHapusI think your paragraph is good enough...
But I still find some mistakes in your writing....
So you must be carefull in your writing assignment again...
That;s all!!!
Do;t forget for giving me a comment,,,
By:Ria Anggraini.S
120810492G
By : Yulia Primita Sari (120810494G)
BalasHapusHi dita..........
Thank you for your comment in my blog before.
- I think your paragraph is so far so good.
- About your grammar, I find some mistakes in your paragraph.
- Please your paragraph give space among one paragraph to other paragraph or you give first line one by one in your paragraph. So it can understand different your paragraph.